Anxiety

In order to understand what happened today you need to understand what happened during the years I worked at Western.

Western was a high stress company to work for - not only because of the volume of work but because of the increasing abusiveness of the people I worked for. P would make you feel like you were stupid and you didn't know anything - he would call you into his office and just go off on a long lecture about how you had done something "wrong" - wrong because it wasn't the exact way he would have done it. P was very controlling and had to make sure you knew he was in charge every second of the day. For the last year I was there, everyday I went to work I was made to feel incompetent and that I could never do anything right. After being in that environment for so long it's not surprising that there are some lasting effects.

This brings us back to today. As I was driving to work today the closer I got to the office the more stressed out I got - my hands started to shake - my stomach started to hurt - and I had the most horrible headache. I have never had an anxiety attack before but that is exactly what it was. All stemming from what happened on Friday combined with my experiences at Western - this created a stress induced anxiety attack.

I love the drama in my life - Not!

OK - on to a lighter subject. Heroes premiered tonight!! I love that show and the premier has not disappointed so far.

Tomorrow is another day.

De